“Shh, be still and quiet. You’ve been sleeping for quite a while. I think they realized that you never left the building last night. The cameras were searching for you, but they couldn’t find you. I have you hidden too well. I kidnapped you."

Don’t be afraid, I’m not going to hurt you. I’m only going to keep you for a little while. Try not to wiggle, though. You’re inside something that came from my old pizzeria. I don’t think it was ever used, at least not the way it was meant to be used. Too dangerous. It’s just big enough for one person to fit inside, but just barely. You’re in the Scooping Room. Do you know why they call it the Scooping Room? It’s because, dummy, this is the room where they use the scooper. I thought that would be obvious. Isn’t that a fun name for something? The scooper. It sounds like something you would use for ice cream or custard or sprinkles. It sounds like something you would want at your birthday party to ensure, that you get a heaping portion of every good thing. I wonder, though, if you were a freshly opened pint of ice cream how you would feel about something with that name. Thankfully, don’t think a freshly opened pint of ice cream feels anything at all.