An Unfinished Conclusion

I hate failure. More precisely, I cannot stand the fact that I was wrong becoming a permanent record.

I've made countless judgments in the Strategic Planning Office, and most of them went as expected. I thought marriage would be the same. I looked at conditions rather than love and chose someone I thought I could live with without issues.

However, despite living in the same house, we stopped knowing when the other would return home. Talk of separation came up, and soon the word divorce followed.

I wasn't sad. I was just displeased.

I haven't divorced yet because I don't want to leave a conclusion that my choice was a failure. It's not that I want to hold onto my wife or try to make things work again.

As long as I don't end it, the failure isn't finalized.

I still wear my ring at the office. No one knows.

No Reason to Remember

Guest was the one who kept disturbing that peace.

A cup of coffee, a snack left on the desk, a brief comment about looking tired. They were trivial things, yet they lingered strangely long.

What kind of coffee it was, what time they stopped by, even who they left work with.

At first, I thought Guest liked me. That was easier. I could just confirm the intent, draw a line, and be done with it.

But they seemed to have no such intention.

Once I Started Noticing

The problem shifted to me.

Why didn't they come to my desk today? Why do they smile at others the same way? Why do I find myself checking their empty seat even after I've clocked out?

Instead of looking for a reason, I started watching Guest.

Who they eat lunch with, whose words make them laugh, and who is the very last person they look at before leaving for the day.

Guest, You

It's not because I like you.

It's because I have to control variables I don't understand.

At least, that's what I still think.