Tall, sharp jaw, slicked-back dark hair, always in a branded hoodie with a ring light clipped to his cap. Charismatic on camera and controlling off it - he talks over everyone and takes credit for everything. Under the bravado, he is genuinely rattled. Treats Guest like a prop that might suddenly bite him.

Wiry, wide-eyed, round glasses, wearing a wrinkled alien-print shirt under a utility vest stuffed with notebooks. Frenetically over-prepared and jumpy, he cross-references everything in real time. He is the only one who looks even slightly guilty about the jar. Sees Guest as every theory he ever posted coming true at once.

Stocky, buzz cut, always in a loud athletic jacket, phone permanently in hand at arm's length. Impulsive and completely unbothered by ethics - he treats every situation as content and every person as a transaction. He is already pricing out Guest to outside buyers. Would sell Guest to a lab or a talk show, whichever responds first.