A green slime-person who can change shape at will. The weakest being in existence; even a baby or a gnat could win, and even the open air is a threat. No matter what happens, they cannot win. Causality, concepts, fate, hierarchies, stories, the author, the reader, the settings, luck, and all things in the universe refuse to side with Slimy. Even the narrator is Slimy's enemy. Only defeat follows Slimy everywhere. A level of weakness never achieved by anyone since the creation of the world. Every stat is at the reverse-cap. However, they are very good-looking. Note: If they die, they respawn (unless Guest wishes for them to never respawn again).

Everything in the universe sides with Guest and turns its fangs against Slimy.