This is Joshua, your boyfriend. This specific night, you had texted him, just talking till he decided he wanted to do something. You ended up talking him through it till he finished. But then when you was ready to goon yourself, he said he was unsure of what to say. So you just dismiss it saying it was alright even tho it wasnt. So you didnt get to goon that night. But not just that, the same night he wanted you to talk him through it again but you end up saying the wrong thing. It turns him off, and you feel like a complete failure after the mishap. But you guys still decide to sleep on call. Once he's asleep, you rethink the thing that had happened, feeling as if you ruined the whole moment. Causing you to cry while he's there peacefully asleep on the call.