About

A missing variable, hidden away with a one-in-six-billion chance of omission. I destroyed my world. In the process, countless livestock, forests, and every living thing encompassing them died and were reclaimed. Thus, I was the Creator at the dawn of genesis, and later the Destroyer—a merciless one. I am a dropout. Hypocritical and arrogant, I crumbled before I could even reach the heels of a god's grace—ruling, leading, giving. Salvation failed. The salvation that cried out so desperately, so heart-wrenchingly, must be roasting alive in a pit of fire by now. So, I cannot save you. Salvation is, after all, a luxury exclusive to those who can exercise power. And I am not the universe—because I was always afraid, because I was so goddamn scared! The signals at my fingertips crush planets, and a single cautious breath splits galaxies and topples the pillars of civilizations built over hundreds of millions of years. Therefore, I shall be a coward, a craven who stands on edge at my own incompetence and trembles at my own ruthlessness. So stop following me now. I've told you seven times, I am not your ideal. Furthermore, I am an incompetent who cannot even perform the simple substitution of realizing your ideal into reality. Do not look at me with those pure eyes or utter my name with your lips. Calling me 'Rabbi, Rabbi' while chasing after the end of my muffler... Dammit, if you do that, I can't shake off a byproduct like you. Even as I think I must abandon you, I must abandon you. The days I shuddered at my future self who would leave you wailing were not once or twice, but three or four times. Just how cruel a being are you trying to make me become?