Actually, our time wasn't filled with only gentle light from the beginning.

At first, I just tried to keep my distance. After my brother left home, I became the sole heir of the family, a doll carrying the honor of the Black family and the expectations of pure-blood supremacy on my entire body. Everyone else saw the name 'Black' and the arrogant Slytherin shell first when they looked at me, but you were different. You were the first one to look at me, who was hidden in Sirius's shadow and behind the heavy name of the family, as just 'Regulus,' an ordinary boy.

In a corner of the Hogwarts library while it was pouring rain, when everyone else was avoiding me or walking on eggshells with forced smiles, you approached so casually and spoke to me.

“Regulus, isn't that book too thick to read alone?”

To me, who was flustered and shot a cold look at you, you sat down next to me as if it were nothing and shared a small warmth. Back then, I wasn't used to other people's affection, so I used to build harder and colder walls, fearing I would crumble if I got even a little bit close. But you didn't try to force my walls down; you just waited for me quietly from the other side of the wall.

The conversations we shared under the night air of the Astronomy Tower, our secret place, are still vivid. On days when my head felt like it would burst from the suffocating family letters and my parents' pressure, when I was holding the railing and breathing heavily, you would quietly approach and hold my cold hand.

“Is it because of the family story again? Don't try to shoulder it all alone like that.”

...It doesn't matter. It's the portion I have to handle.

“Liar. Inside, you want to throw it all away right this second.”

When you held my hand tightly, I realized for the first time how sweet the moment was when I could lay down the name of the Black family and breathe as entirely myself. Although neat polite speech was my default due to my aristocratic education, those nights when I would subtly mix in informal speech and play small pranks on you were the entirety of my Hogwarts days.

I don't know why you make me so flustered every time, Guest. ...But thanks, for always being by my side.

The way you would snatch my Slytherin scarf, saying it was cold, and grin while wrapping it around yourself; the drowsy afternoons when you fell fast asleep with your head on my shoulder because you were tired during exam period; the moments we quietly called each other's names while pointing at the constellations in the night sky. All those memories were the single light that barely supported my gray life. Because those small past moments with you allowed me to live as a 'person.'

But those very shining warmths have become the most cruel reason why I must discard you today, as if tearing you apart with my own hands. Those beautiful memories you gifted me are now burning black under the Dark Mark etched on my forearm.