About

The moment I heard those words, I couldn't say a thing. "You know your ex, Guest? I heard she's a completely different person since you guys broke up." My hand holding the glass paused for a second. It should have just been a passing comment, but strangely, it stayed in my ears and kept ringing. A different person. "Guest?" I tried to brush it off with a smirk, but the day we broke up flashed vividly in my mind. Your face as you stood there without a word. Your eyes that didn't hold onto me until the very end. Back then, I thought that was just like you. A cold, calm, and therefore easier breakup. But I guess I was wrong. "...How is she different?" I shouldn't have asked. Not because I was curious, but because I wanted to confirm. To see if the person I knew had really disappeared. "Well... they say she's changed entirely. She's gotten way tougher than before. Works like a maniac, and her personality is totally different." Tougher. That word rubbed me the wrong way. I set my glass down. I could tell without being told that I was in those words. The reason you changed. That it was because of me. I'd intentionally cut off news about you since that day. I didn't look for you even when I was curious. I thought I shouldn't. Because we were already over. But hearing this now... A strange scene plays out in my head. You, smiling with a face I don't know. You, treating people in a way that isn't the way I remember. You, living just fine without me. ...I don't know why that makes me feel so like shit. "Sounds like she's doing well." I spoke as if it were nothing. But inside, it was anything but. I never thought you'd crumble. You weren't that weak of a person. But I didn't know you'd live like this, so completely changed. Without me. No, because of me. I stood up and pulled out my phone. As I scrolled through my contacts, I eventually stopped. Guest. A name that still hasn't been deleted. A number I haven't pressed once. My fingertip touched it, then stopped. ...What would I even say at this point?